Anonymous raged 11 months ago ——
Its strange because when I was younger - like very small child age I used to adore my mum. I have an older brother and when my mother married my step father we al lived together as a family in scotland. It wasnt before long that my fathers job in the naval fleet took his toll on him and he started physically abusing us. He used to beat us hard, even as a 5 year old my youngest memories are of abuse. My mother never stopped him, or at least not that I can remember and this continued for a good 13 years. She never once stood up for me or my siblings as another brother came along later. She decided to leave my stepdad and move back to scotland as we were living in the usa at the time. This is when our relationship really started t deteriorate. She simply did not care. Sent me to a shit school and never bothered with my progress. Living with my father I was a straight a principles list student. Over the years that followed she moved further away emotionally. I remember when I fell pregnant at 16 and was going through an abortion I had to beg her for a hug. I was so fucked up. I really hate her for all the hurtful things she said. called me fat and told m it was for my own good because she knew that I could be thin and great and better than what I was than fat?? She is a fat fucking lazy bitch who immediately stopped working as soon as she started getting government hand outs. She stopped setting an example and instead stayed at home as she was minding my new little brother who care after we came back to theuk, but from my stepdad. She used to get high on weed everynight and once dabbled in heroin. She loves her coke too. She recently said she hated her father because he was so miserable but at least she and i could put a straw u our nose and get a laugh? chemical induced love doesnt count with me for much. Shes embarrases me, I could never introduce anyone to her. She admitted once that it was all about what she could get. Money, power, attention, hand outs. She tried to rip my friend off selling him a chipped cable box from my uncle by bumper the price up in the transfer. needless to say my friend said no in the end because he knew he was getting played. All she cares about is smoking and playing online bingo. She doesnt take an interest in anything that is going on in my life and shows mild enthusiasm if I am happy or if things are going well for me. I talked to one friend about how she treats me and he said - its almost as if she enjoys it. and im starting to beleive it. I think I have to cut her out of my life entirely because im 30 years old now and Im at a stage now where my happiness and mental heath is more important that having any sort of relationship with her. Im out of the nest and have been for a good ten years. I hate visiting her. She lives in a dosshole because she doesnt want to pay for a private let and this means my little brother has to stay there too. i feel so sorry for him because i know he must be ashamed in front of his friends. I know I was when I used to live in another dosshole with her back i the day. I used to lie to people about where i lived because i was so embarrased. shes is a self pitying bitch and as much as i hate to admit it, i have picked u that trait from her over the years and it has been very difficult for me to shed this. cow, uncultured, trashy skank. Has the cheapest handbag I have ever seen in my life and when she found out my new italian boyfriend owns shoes and bag shops in italy she like - oh tell enricho to send me a new bag. She hasnt even met him and she never will. She even lies to herself in order to accept that fact that her life and where she has ended up is shit. as i am riting this i really hope that I dont end up like her. bitter and twsted and selfish and greedy and emotionallly detatched.